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Kids at weddings - Yay or Nay?

3/14/2020

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Photo: @jessfairchild
At some point while you are planning your wedding the question of having a family friendly event that includes young children vs an adult only affair will come up and can be a very tricky topic to navigate.  If the thought of having children at your wedding presents a lot of challenges you may prefer to limit the number of children or exclude them completely. Either way, you will need to find ways to explain your decision to your guests without upsetting or offending them if possible.  Here are some tips to help you make a decision that works for you without ruffling too many feathers.
Discuss and Decide - Early
You and your fiance need to have an honest discussion about this topic and how you feel about having children at your wedding so that you can make a decision early on in the planning stages. When making your guest list, make a note of how many children each family member or friend has as well as their ages. The number of children in attendance can significantly add to your wedding budget and overall headcount. Ask yourselves if you are comfortable including children and the additional costs you may incur by doing so. 
Children are Unpredictable
Not only can adding children to your wedding have an impact on your budget, children are are also quite  unpredictable in their behavior. Consider the type of venue where your wedding is taking place. Is this venue family friendly? Is there enough space for children to play or run around? Will the parents be responsible enough to monitor them and keep watch on what they're doing so they aren't being disruptive during important moments? These are some questions to consider and to discuss with your partner and possibly your families if you have concerns.
Tell Your Guests 
Once you have decided it is important to let your guests know your expectations and make it clear what the plan is for having children at the wedding or not. If you are not inviting children, explain your reasons either in person, over the phone, in an email or on your wedding website. 

If you decided to only have a few children present (if they are part of the wedding ceremony for example) explain that to your guests.  Tell your guests that are not able to bring their children that you have a limit on your headcount and are unfortunately unable to accommodate every family member. Offer your apologies and a possible solution such as a babysitting service if they need to hire someone for the evening. Some guests may not understand your reasoning, but this is your wedding and you don't have to explain yourself too much. You get the final say. 
@thelittlealli
Having a Family Affair 
If you do decide a family friendly affair is what you want, make some arrangements to help entertain the children who will be attending such as a fun craft table with games, coloring books, puzzles and other fun activities to keep them occupied. ​

Have a children's menu that is different from your "adult" menu. Very small children and infants won't each much or their parents may bring them special meals and snacks to eat. For older children it may be a good idea to offer a few choices such as pizza, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, french fries, fruit and a special dessert that is less formal and smaller portions.

Hire a children's entertainer such as a face painter, balloonist or magician to provide a fun element for a short time during the wedding reception. Adding and interactive and engaging element to the wedding that they don't get to experience often is not only fun but also memorable for everyone. 
Consider enlisting help through a local babysitting service. There are many babysitting or nanny services available for just this sort of thing. They arrive at your venue and set up a special area for children such as a separate room and create a safe and fun space for them to gather and play together during times that you agree to. They often bring age appropriate games, activities and toys to entertain children which is included in their fees, giving you one less thing to worry about!  If your wedding is quite formal they can also serve dinner away from where the adults are seated. This works well if you plan to have toasts and speeches during dinner and don't want any disruptions. 
Remember, It's Your Day!
Remember, this is your day so you get to decide what is best for you. Just know that not everyone will agree with your choices and that's ok. You will never be able to please everyone and it's not your job to do so. As long as you and your partner make the decision together and stick to it you'll be fine in the end.
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Grace Tyler Photography by Jamie Fredrickson
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Are you planning a wedding or just a big party?

1/17/2020

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Brooke Borough Photography
Many couples I consult with seem to want to have the quickest ceremony possible and then move on to the reception.  They say things like "we just want it to be fun!" or "we just want to have a party!"  That's all great.

Have fun! 

Party!

Enjoy yourself! 

But there is also something to say about a wedding ceremony and the reason FOR the party.  People are there to have fun of course, but they're also there to witness the two people who are joining their lives together. The couple who is getting MARRIED and making a HUGE commitment to each other. That is the reason the wedding is even taking place.

So please put some thought into it and don't rush! You'll get to enjoy the party soon enough. Take time to write your vows and make it meaningful. Get creative. Include loved ones. Play your favorite music. Set the tone for the day and the mood you want everyone to feel. This is your moment. The one you've been planning for months (or years)!  You will have plenty of other reasons to party and celebrate for the rest of your life. But your wedding... that is different. You only get one of those (if you're lucky). 
IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A PARTY, HAVE A PARTY.

 IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A WEDDING, THEN PLAN AN ACTUAL WEDDING.

THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
What makes a wedding different than other events is tradition. And I guarantee your guests who are flying across country or driving across state lines to get to the wedding want to see some of those traditions. There are certain expectations that people have when it comes to weddings. Maybe you're not the traditional type and you want to do things your way. I get that. But a wedding needs to feel like a wedding and not just a dinner party or some random event.
What are some of the most common wedding traditions?

1.  A ring exchange 
2. Wedding vows
3. A bridal bouquet
4. Bride being escorted down the aisle
5. Bridesmaids and Groomsmen
6. Serving wedding cake
7. The first dance
8. Dances with parents
9. Toasts and speeches
10. A bouquet and/or garter toss
You don't have to incorporate all of these and you can certaintly put your own spin on some of them. There are ways to get creative when it comes to weddings and making them feel personal and unique. It doesn't need to feel like your grandma's wedding day but a little bit of those old school values and tried and true traditions will go a long way in making your wedding day a memorable one for all. 
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 Elise Nicole Photo
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Angie + Chris // Santa Barbara Women's Club

1/6/2020

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Thank you to the amazing team of vendors and everyone involved in making this day so special for these two lovely people! 
​
Wedding Coordination:  Gatherings for Good
Venue:  Santa Barbara Women's Club

Catering:  Lucca Truck 
Bartending: Simply Cocktails

Rentals: The Tent Merchant
Photography: NPO Photography

Ceremony Music: The Desk Set
DJ: Val-Mar Records

​Flower arrangements: Gathered Blooms
Cake: Lele Patisserie
Guest Book Typewriter: Simon Kiefer 
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My Wedding Dress is for sale!!

11/15/2019

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I am selling my gorgeous San Patrick Eresma dress that I love so much! I've been holding on to it since my wedding in 2015 and am hoping to find someone who will love it just as much as I did! This dress exceeded my expectations! It was not what I imagined my dress to be but once I tried it on in the shop I knew this was THE ONE! I knew as soon as I put it on. I felt like a bride! 
To see more pictures of me wearing the dress, check out the blog post I did on my very own wedding day!
​
https://www.gatheringsforgood.com/blog/a-wedding-planners-wedding-the-inspiration-the-challenges-and-the-story-behind-our-big-day
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Photos by James & Jess 
Description:  Beautiful strapless wedding dress, size 6. Sweetheart neckline, floral lace details and gemstone embroidery. Fitted with mermaid ruffled skirt. More pics can be found online of this style. (Google: San Patrick Eresma Wedding Dress)

This stunning dress can be yours for only $399!
(Shipping and handling fees not included)


For inquiries, please contact brenda@gatheringsforgood.com.
​Located in California. Shipping available within the USA. Contact me for details! 
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Stacey & Garrett's Pink & Navy Nuptials at the Riviera Mansion

10/17/2019

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Thank you to the talented team who helped make this an amazing day for our lovely couple! 

Wedding Coordination:  Gatherings for Good
Venue/Catering: Riviera Mansion 

Rentals: Discount Party Rentals
DJ: Prince William
​Flowers: Ranay Schmandt
Dessert: Enjoy Cupcakes
Bride's Makeup: Chi Beauty Artistry 

Photography: Native Heart Photography 
Videography:  Foster Films
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Cris & ALlison's Wine country Wedding

8/7/2019

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Tucked away off Highway 246 and minutes from Solvang and Buellton, CA is a gorgeous sprawling family owned event space that is a total hidden gem and a must see for anyone wanting a private outdoor wedding in the heart of wine country along the beautiful central coast of California. We recently had the pleasure of coordinating Cris and Allison's wedding at La Arboleda and the pictures speak for themselves. This venue has something for everyone. 
This rustic romantic getaway includes two separate suites for the couple to get ready in, a built in bar and kitchen, covered dining and dance area, built in stage, paved walkways, lush gardens and an abundance of natural surroundings. For this wedding the bride chose white and pink floral arrangements created by Bella Florist for her bouquet and centerpieces which complimented the natural beauty of the space perfecly.
Keeping with the natural and rustic look, the family style tables were decorated with a neutral runner across the center topped with gold votives and gorgeous blooms in wooden containers. Wine barrels were spread throughout the venue and used as cocktail tables. Guests were treated to a lovely meal starting with antipasto during cocktail hour followed by authentic Italian wood-fired pizzas made on-site and fresh green salads catered by Santa Barbara restaurant Bettina Pizzeria.

Dessert included an lavish assortment of delicious mini cupcakes in a variety of flavors from another Santa Barbara favorite, Enjoy Cupcakes. The Bride, Groom and their guests danced to music provided by the ever popular and always entertaining DJ Zeke who also provided the photo booth for an extra bit of fun.

This was one unforgettable day that we were so thankful to have been part of. Congrats to the happy couple!
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This wedding was simply stunning! Thank you to the amazing team who helped make their day so special!
​
Wedding Coordination:  Gatherings for Good
Venue:  La Arboleda 

Catering:  Bettina Pizzeria
Staffing: Central Coast Party Helpers 
Bartending: Bottles & Ice

Rentals: Santa Ynez Valley Elite Events
Music: DJ Zeke
Photo Booth: 
DJ Zeke
​Flowers: Bella Florist 
Dessert: Enjoy Cupcakes
Bride's Makeup: Renee Jean Makeup

Photo/Video:  My World Productions
Transportation: Next Adventure Tours & Tastings
Guest Accommodations: The Sideways Inn
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Shannon & Cameron's SUrfside Ceremony

7/31/2019

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Shannon and Cameron got exactly what they wanted for their wedding day... a beautiful beach ceremony followed by a fun and intimate evening celebrating with close family and friends. These two love birds were all smiles on their big day despite some cool and overcast weather conditions. None of that mattered though because the love and excitement beaming from their adorable faces was enough to warm everyone's hearts from beginning to end.

​From their ear to ear smiles to their fashionable sneakers to their sincere and genuine vows proclaiming their love for one another, to an amazing buffet dinner and homemade cookies for dessert (made by the groom's mother), ending with some serious dance moves to music by the one and only DJ Freddy Sparxx, it could not have been a more perfect day! 

We love how the bride and groom incorporated personal touches into their decor including a photo of their beloved cat (who was no able to attend), personalized hot sauce favors, homemade cookies and brownies, and some stylish personal accessories which added a bit of flair to their tropical beachy theme that was seen throughout their wedding. The fun and upbeat atmosphere complimented both the bride and groom's sunny personalities perfectly.  

My team and I were thrilled to be part of their journey and their beautiful wedding day and see it all come together seamlessly. ​
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Thank you to the talented team of wedding professional who made this day possible and for making Shannon and Cameron's wedding an unforgettable day!
​
Wedding Coordination: Gatherings for Good
Venue & Accommodations: Hyatt Centric Hotel
Catering/Staffing: Hyatt Centric Hotel

Rentals: Hyatt Centric Hotel 
Officiant: Pastor G 

Ceremony Music: Hyatt Centric Hotel
Reception Music: DJ Freddy Sparxx 

​Flowers: Tangled Lotus 
Cake: Jeannine's Bakery 

Photography: Jeffrey Biri, Classic Photographers
Bride's Hair:
 Cassi Young-Paxton
Bride's Makeup: Andrea Mae Beauty

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Danielle & ANdrew's sprawling estate Wedding

6/12/2019

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We don't know what is more beautiful - this gorgeous venue or this stunning couple! One thing is for sure. We were thrilled and honored to be part of Danielle and Andrew's amazing wedding at the breathtaking Slay Estate & Vineyard right here in my little town of Lompoc, CA. This Tuscan style private estate and winery was the perfect destination for this glamorous couple to say "I Do" in front of family and friends who traveled from near and far, taking in the sights and beauty of the California Central Coast.
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If you are searching for a wedding venue this one should definitely be on your list of places to see. Please contact us or visit https://www.slayestateandvineyard.com/ for more details. 
Thank you to everyone who helped make this incredible day possible.
​
Wedding Coordination: Gatherings for Good
Venue: Slay Estate & Vineyard
Catering/Staffing: David Slay, Slay Estate & Vineyard

Rentals: Bright Event Rentals
Music - Ceremony: Kevin Fox, Pianist
Music - Reception: Complete Weddings & Events

​Flowers: Bella Florist
Photography: DA Photoz
Videography: Ashley Watson Videography
Signage: The Blue Farmhouse

Cake: 1914 Bakery
Hair & Makeup: Fairytale Hair & Makeup
Transportation: Jump on the School Bus
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Wedding Trends we love in 2019

3/9/2019

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Moody Color Palettes
Darker edgier color palettes are a big trend this year and we couldn't be happier about it. In recent years we have seen a lot of soft colors including bright white, yellow, soft blue, lavender and the ever popular blush and light pinks. Now couples are going to the darker side opting for deep rich berry reds, burgundy, rust, mahogany, and garnet mixed with a variety of filler greens like Dusty Miller, Eucalyptus, Italian Ruscus and Myrtle to compliment the look. These colors have typically been reserved for fall and winter weddings however they can work year round! Don't be afraid to be adventurous and play with colors that typically wouldn't go together.
Images via Unsplash
Minimalism
Clean lines and well placed minimal decor is the way to pull off a minimalistic look for your wedding. Minimalism doesn't mean boring. It can be beautifully refreshing when done right. By incorporating wood tones, structured centerpieces and other natural elements you can create a elegant look just by choosing a simple color palette and 2 or 3 accent colors to tie it all together. It can be tempting at times to over do table decor creating a very cluttered and busy space. If that is not your style, a minimalistic approach might be a better choice for you. The overall look is delicate and very pleasing to the eye.
Images via Willhouse Photography
Statement Cakes
Not everyone is a fan of a traditional wedding cake, however statement wedding cakes are trending this year and for good reason. They're beautiful, they make for amazing photos and they can be customized and as unique as you are. No two weddings are alike and not all wedding cakes are made the same way. If you're looking to add something that will make your wedding day stand out consider a beautiful statement cake.
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Images via Unsplash
Beauty Bars
No, we're not talking about a new cleanser for your face or hip new fitness studio. We're talking about on-site beauty bars or "glam bars" that are set up at your wedding venue in restrooms, bridal ready rooms or even out in the open. Hair and makeup pros are hired to give your guests a quick touch up whenever they need it so they are picture perfect at any given moment. A simple lipstick refresh, some powder on the nose or a swipe of blush or mascara can help your gals feel glam all night long. Pros can also keep extra bobby pins, hairspray and curling irons on hand to help keep your do sleek and stylish so you can dance the night away looking your best well into the after party.
Image via  Grace Tyler Photography                             Image via Unsplash                                                  Image by Alexandra Wallace 
Lighting
Lighting gets a boost this year from what we have typically seen in past weddings like uplighting which many people use to add color and ambiance to a large room to make it feel more intimate, or string lights that are strung from tree to tree at outdoor weddings. In 2019 we'll be seeing a variety of new and exciting ways to enhance your space using brightly colored neon, basket lanterns and the use of pendant lamps hanging from the ceiling or structures above. Playing with lighting can be both fun and functional and is highly recommended to enhance your overall wedding aesthetic. Whether you want to highlight one area or an entire room choosing the right type of lighting will be key to your success. 
Images via Unsplash
If you're looking for tips and ideas to make your wedding stand out and want to work with us, contact us here for a free quote!  Visit our weddings page for a list of packages and services we offer.
Contact us
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Venue Spotlight - La Arboleda ranch

3/1/2019

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This stunning venue is one of Santa Barbara County's most hidden gems!  La Arboleda Ranch is a private outdoor oasis located near the Santa Rita Hills just off Highway 246. This beautifully landscaped property includes both indoor/outdoor structures, several ceremony location options and lush backdrops. 

Throughout the property are paved walkways for ease and accessibility, a built in stage and dance area, market lighting along the trellised areas, a large covered space for your dinner reception, an elegant and fully equipped bridal suite, a large built in bar as well as women's and men's restroom facilities.

​Guests can enjoy multiple entertainment areas while wandering around the property admiring the breathtaking views including a flowing waterfall that feeds into a meandering stream. This rustic and romantic setting will be talked about by your friends and family for years to come. 
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Parking is limited. Shuttles are recommended for weddings over 50 people.
Visit the La Arboleda  website for more information on pricing and availability. 
Gatherings for Good is available to help coordinate your wedding at La Arboleda Ranch! Contact us for packages and pricing. See our weddings page for more details.
Contact us
Coordination: Gatherings for Good // Floral: Bella Florist // Hair: Lindsey Rule, Shear Salon and Day Spa // Makeup: Candi Michele // Venue: La Arboleda // Invitation Suite: Vibrant Imagery // Bridal Dress, Shoes, Jewelry and Tux: A Heart’s Desire Bridal // Wedding Ring: Bumatay Jewelers // Vintage Rentals: The Blue Farmhouse // Gift Favor Bags: Just 2 Sweet Candy Creations and Events // Bakery: Sweet Baking Co. Hair Accessory: Julie Miller of Little Girl’s Pearls // Artisan Bread: Three Flies on a Knife // Classic Automobile: Lompoc Antique Auto Club ​​
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    Brenda Cali is a professionally trained Wedding Consultant and plans a variety of social and corporate events.

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  • About
  • Services
    • Parties, Non-Profit & Corporate Events
    • Wedding Packages >
      • Wedding FAQ
    • Elopements, Vow Renewals & Micro Weddings
    • Memorial Services & Celebration of Life
  • XOXO
  • Blog
  • Styled
  • Contact